Friday, September 16, 2011

Taking #2 out of the Kinesthetic/Intrapersonal/Sensory Processing Disorder Box, to let him think

Have you ever met a deep thinker?
Some one who is so focused on their own thoughts, that they do not hear anything else. As of late, I have been wondering what a deep thinker can do for a living. With so many wonderful thoughts to think, I would hate for my little deep thinker to be stuck at a 9 to 5 job, answering to a boss or deadline.
I wish I could pay for a personal tutor for my little deep thinker. I wish I could let him think all the thoughts he wants to think. Without having to stand in line, pay attention, or do work sheets.
I want to paint this picture for you. So, I will try to describe it, the best I can. I went to school today, to eat lunch with #1, #2, and #3. When it was time for me to eat with #2, I went to find him. He was out at recess. There were hundreds of kids running and playing. The play ground is slightly raised-about 1 foot off the ground, with a plastic retaining wall surrounding it. #2 was balancing the retaining wall. I walked up behind #2. I said his name. "OK mom, this is the rules, if you fall, you have to start again at the last corner" A kid from his class comes up to him, says his name, and asks him to play. He doesn't respond. Eventually the kid leaves. A girl ( looked like a 6th grader) sits on the retaining wall in front of him. "Please Move." She does, and on he goes. Undeterred. He makes it to the apparent starting point. "Yes, I win!! OK mom, what do you want?" I laugh and ask him to eat lunch with me. "No thanks, I have to make it around 2 more times before recess is over" Love you boy!
A few days ago I went to pick #2 up after school. He was sitting with about 100 kids in the Media Center. Every one was quiet, but it wouldn't have mattered if #2 was alone or with a million people he could not have been more deep in thought. I called his name. He glanced my way, and then went back on to thinking. A couple kids nudged him, but he didn't register it. The vice principal called his name, but he didn't notice. I walked over to him got down at eye level and said, "what are you thinking about bud?" He said, "How does she do it Mom?" "Who do what?" I dumbly asked He pointed to a mural on the wall where several "she's" stood out to me. "Oh like this" he says as he holds up a peace sign. Then I see the woman he is talking about. An African American hippy doing the peace sign with her fingers.
After recess, #2's teacher let him come and sit and chat with me for a while. We were sitting at a table when another family asked to sit with us. A european american mother with 2 african american sons. After a short conversation where #2 remained quiet, he finally spoke up. "did you adopt those 2 boys?" The mother said that their father was from Nigeria. "So he had dark skin and they have dark skin like him?" affirmative.
This week we talked about trials-one of them being school for #2, another trial being a mother who gets frustrated, and it seems like she does not understand. Dad said when he was a little boy he felt the same way. #2 said, "But then you learned that Heavenly Father gives us trials to help us be better, more like him?" yep, lesson was over.
Yesterday #2's Afterschool teacher pulled me aside. She was shaking with frustration. Been there, before comprehension. #2 just cannot come to the afterschool program any more. He is clearly not mature enough for the program. Maybe he can try again in the spring.
As I look at the situation with a perspective that is foriegn to me, I realize that some day #2 will be thinking freeing thoughts( I am reminded of Plato and Aristotle) , while this uninformed teacher will still be trying to put 1st graders into boxes labeled "will conform" or "reject".
If a picture really is worth a thousand words I have 2 for you

Man, have I seen that look before! Can't wait till the Spirit world when I get to swap stories with his Mom. By the way, do you think some relief society sisters are comforting Hitlers mom? I hope I get to! But that is beside the point.

By the way, I asked #2's teacher how he was doing today. She said, "well he does really good, except for transitions. It is almost like he doesn't hear me. Maybe you should check his hearing" :)

1 comment:

Meikjn said...

yes I have met a deep thinker me!!! I was stuck in the same place as your son. I was diagnosed with ADD in 4th grade(because a teacher wanted to help), and my parents ignored and denied it, and I was never treated. please know that you are just what he needs. you do not deny his problems, and as I can see from this post you are in his school to see what it is like for him. please keep working on it. you are doing a good job. I wish someone had noticed me. it does get easier. I have never been "cured" but I have as I have gotten older learned what behaviors hold me back and have learned to adjust. if he has someone to help him understand those things instead of him having to figure it out, it will be all the better. I know my problems are not the same as his, but I believe learning disabilities are similar. at least as far as their social challenges. you are doing great, and being frustrated is not quitting!!!!! he appreciates your hard work and he will more when he gets older. your son is lucky to have you.